Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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Penis

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

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Why did the Asian crash her car? Someone shit on her windsheild.

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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What did the Pedophile say to the small girl? I have served my sentence and been successfully rehabilitated. Please continue playing out in public without fear of being sexually assaulted.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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asdasdasdasd

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A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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