Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Um no horses are overrated.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

i cant STAND cripple jokes

What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

call me maybe.

Why are lawers are so scared of Jerry bryant? Because he bites

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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