"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

Racial equality.

What really killed Adolf Hitler? The gas bill

what do you call it when everyone becomes tolerant about gender identity. whatever pronoun it prefers.

David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Dave. Dave, who? Dave, your neighbor, I ran out of eggs making a quiche, could I borrow a few?

Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

What do you call a dog? A cat. What do you call a cat? A banana.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

Why couldn't the black man swim? He has no legs.

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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