Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

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Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Whats black and hanging from a tree in my backyard? A tire swing

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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What did the ant say to the bush? Ernest Borgnine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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What's even worse than getting a parking ticket on your birthday? Child molestation.

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A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, it hurts when i poke my leg like this!" The doctor says,"Mm yes, it seems you have taken an arrow to the knee. You'll never walk again."

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

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Why didn't the black man understand an anti-joke? Because like any other member of the human race, he expected a typical joke structure to occur, starting with a misleading introduction which then using surrealism or misguidance trails into a humorous punchline.

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Why couldn't the little boy open his bedroom door? He was dead.

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What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

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What was the women doing out of the kitchen? Watching the movie 'Birth of a Nation' at her father's house

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How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops