Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

what did steven hawking say to the prostitute? Nothing, he is unable to speak, he needs help from his word speaker thing.

A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

Once upon a time, Ducks THE END

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

i know a guy called ryan he is a benny he has a combover

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because Acl tear stepped on a spit.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

why did the chicken cross the road, but didnt make it he didnt cross it. he was pushed by a band of gang members and hit by a bus

Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...