- Anti Joke

What did superman say when he flew into a building? Flying is inhumanly possible unless in an aircraft vehicle.

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

What did the southern uncle say to his nephew when he woke up? Good morning, son.

Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

Q: Whats pointy and sharp and rhymes with life? A: A spear. It's close enough.

In Soviet Russia, there was a movement to be renamed into the Russian Federation, which passed on December 25, 1991.

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.