your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

What did the prison inmate get for Christmas? A warm chair to sit in

How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

A Jew, a Russian, and a Turk walk into a bar. The Jew asks, "Can I get a glass of Manischewitz?" The bartender serves him. The Russian asks, "Can I get a shot of vodka?" The bartender serves him. The Turk then asks, "Can I get a Turkish coffee?" The bartender looks at him, confused, and says, "Sorry, but this is a bar. Unfortunately we don't serve coffee."

Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

what is worse than a guy pissed?

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

Why was the boy late for class? He was late because he got stabbed and left in the bathroom.

cory

A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

-Doctor! Scientists in California have enough proofs to demonstrate that the Christian religion is false. -Oh my God!

What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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