What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

what did the ghost say to the bee boo-bee

What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

why did the boy drop his bus because he was hit by an ice cream

Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

How do you make a great cake? Bett Crocker books

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

Hello. my name is Rhys. and i'm the only person who liked this post.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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