Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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A woman says Renae has a butt... Two men say we don't care we have her hammer. True story.

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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Whats the most impotent thing to remember when your going skateboarding? A skateboard.

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How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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What's Worse Than World War I 2 World War I's

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An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

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A black man a mexican and a caucasian were walking together. The black man and the mexican walked into a bar. The caucasian ducked. Not because his race makes him smarter in anyway, but because his friends shouted out a warning to him. All three then proceeded to the nearest pub.

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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