A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Once upon a time, The end.

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

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Little Timmy walks into an ice-cream store. He dies on impact.

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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One time there was a girl in a wheelchair and she couldn't walk.

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A fat guy!

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What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops