Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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if life hands u melons, make melonade.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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What's funny about 3 black men in a car going off a cliff? Nothing. They were my friends.

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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Many people protest. they go home after a few hours

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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High school is like forced anal sex, Hard, painful, and you cry your hopes and dreams at the end of it all.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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I like to thumb up my own jokes.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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How do you make a baby stop crying? You slit it's throat.

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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