Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven drove two planes into the world trade center.

What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis

How do a jew, an African, and u white man stop a train? They pull the breaks

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

Two fish are sitting in a tank. One says, "I'll man the guns. You drive."

What did the fly say to the spider? Please, I have a wife and daughter.

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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