Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Do the roar!

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What do you call a joke that is not funny? An un - funny joke.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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Knock knock. Who's there? Quetzalcoatl. Quetzalcoatl who? Quetzalcóatl, Mayan name Kukulcán, (from Nahuatl quetzalli, “tail feather of the quetzal bird [Pharomachrus mocinno],” and coatl, “snake”), the Feathered Serpent, one of the major deities of the ancient Mexican pantheon. Oh... hi.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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If my balls were on your chin, where would my dick be?

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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A Guitar is an instrument. As far as you know...

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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Ask me if I'm a human. Are you a human? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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