Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

who is gay wit mon james cornish

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

What has two legs? Half a cat

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

I once duped this chick with a parrot. Crazy thing wouldn't shut up. The parrot was pretty cool

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

Three men are stranded in a small rowboat. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. It became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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