Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

What's Green and has four wheels? A green car

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

What's the worst thing that can go wrong while trying to archieve something you desperately want? -Everything.

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

How do you make a plumer cry? Kill his family

What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

Whats black and yellow and is funny when its falling off a cliff? A bus full of niggers.

LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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