Uh... You know them N words... When they come crashing into the neiborhood the neiborhood quality drops and gets totally destroyed youknow what im sayan? Uh yeah sure totally... Then you know they spread around smell up dirty and toxicify the whole area, they become so fat and loud and like take everything away from you. Yeah HEIL KKK!! WUUT? I was talking Aboot them Nukular warheds! You you... SOMETHING! Hey! Dont get offensive man, sorry I was just KIDDING!... yeah... KIDDIIING!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

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eat a hot dog

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender asks why the long face. The guy responds because cancer is a horrible disease. Oh yah did I mention the guy has cancer? $

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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why did the chicken cross the road? to touch the goats beard

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Where did suzie go for her Birthday? A van

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What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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You played so good! No, I played well. Okay??

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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