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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

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What did the gay kid in high school say? I'm straight.

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Katy Perry

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

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What's worse than r-a-p-e? Gang r-a-p-e.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

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What do u call a cripple Biv

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taking out the trash... at night

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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What did the famer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?!?!

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A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

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Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered 6 offender. And there was nothing funny about that.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops