What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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Why did the pervert cross the road? Because he couldn't get his knob out of the chicken.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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Your Mum is soo fat.

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a blonde girl gets behind the wheel of a car. and drives to her community college for her morning class

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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The WPGA tour

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Q: How many jews can you fit in a car? A: Well, it varies on the size of the car and the size of the people entering the car so in reality there is no clear answer due to the lack of information given.

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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My little league baseball coach measured the team for cups. Its 9 years later and we still dont have those cups.

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops