What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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You the same as before? I am being a bit overly cautious I admit that, I would call you, the problem is that while you are either pretty good at pretending to be innocent and all, or actually pretty down to earth, I mean I would probably applaud you for tricking me into believing you are pretty sweet before, but I got my wife and her family to take care off now, its not quite the same getting stabbed in the back anymore,

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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You walk by a boy and see he is playing with poop. You ask the boy what are you doing? He says I'm building a office. You ask him why he says "because I don't have shit to make a building"

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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Your momma's so fat that she can't pass through some turnstiles and needs go through some other way with people staring and feel sad about it.

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Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

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What's black and white and red all over? A dead penguin

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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69

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

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how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

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Life is like a box of chocolates, quite strange to enjoy when you're single.

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Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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