The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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how do you get a nun pregnant? have unprotected SEX with her, resulting in expulsion from her convent

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Yo mama's so fat, that we are all extremely concerned for her health.

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im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

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What do you call a black man driving a helicopter? Blackhawk down

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What is green and has wheels???? Yo mamma on a Wednesday.

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Democracy.

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Q: what is the most confusing day in the ghetto? A: fathers Day

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

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What did the cow say to the dog? Moo

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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What do you call a man with no arms an no legs in the ocean? Bob What do you call the same man on your front porch? Matt What do you call the same man on your wall? Art

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Trampoline.

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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A jewish boy walks past a quarter on the ground..

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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