Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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why did haris die...............................................his hair blond? .. u

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Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

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Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

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what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

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what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

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What's small, pale blue and sits at the bottom of the pool? "An over ripe blueberry."

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An Irishman, a Zimbabwean and a South African walk into a bar... oh wait, it's just the English cricket team.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Andoni was here

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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A guy walks into a bar, and says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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