What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happens if you shoot a chicken? It dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red violets are hot dog this rhyme has no sense fork

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down -8

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

And the girl said: "I'll be ready in 2 hours!"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is Kanye West's favorite type of sea-food? Lobster Bisque with a side of french fries.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's big and grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So, my friend David hasn't always been the sharpest tool in the shed. After all, he is a spoon.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops