Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

What's black on top, and white on the bottom? Rape.

I used to know what alzheimers was

Why did Bob scream "Nurrrrrrrrr!!"?.....because he was mentally challenged.

Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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