Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

2 doctors are talking to each other: -Dead? -Dead.

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

What did the church say to the house? You need jesus

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

What's funny to laugh at dying? JEWS!

There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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