Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A guy in mud.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Why did the man run away from the cat? He was allergic

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops