Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

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A man walked in a bar and asked for 10 shots. (not descriptively) The bar tender got his gun out and shot the man 10 times. Another man asked for three stabs at it. The bar tender stabbed him 3 times. The last man asked for a bomb load. The bar tender gave him 100's of granades. Then the man bombed down the bar with the bar tender inside

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Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

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Heskey time.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

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whats worse than a dog biting you? two dogs biting you whats worse than that? the Holocaust whats worse than that three dog bites and one of them happens to have rabies

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silver bullet?

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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lewis=cardiac

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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My favorite color is Ham. And I can count to Potato.

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Why did Hitler try to take over the world? Hitler wanted to spread the Nazi (National Socialism) idea, He also wanted to destroy the Jews(Christian and non-Christian) and many other groups of people using the prevailing scientific idea of the day eugenics and survival of the fittest

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Hey Jake can I use your lawnmower? Why Michael, so you can run over my cat like you did last night

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Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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