Sex

How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Why did they black straight guy go into an all white gay bar....? Because he went to the wrong place.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

Knock knock. Whose there? No one, I'm trying to tell a knock knock joke.

The Princess is in another castle

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What's old and wrinkly? old people

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. The prior sentence is a grammatically correct sentence in American English.

Guess what your birth certificate really is. An apology letter from the condom factory.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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