hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

Bob Saget

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

what has wheels and drives? a boat i lied about the wheels

Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

the lemon was sweet.

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? depends on how hard you throw them

Women deserve equal rights.

Knock knock come in.

Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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