Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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Why did the house burn down? Obama

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What was the last song those aboard the Titanic sang? "Staying alive"

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Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

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What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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Can God do anything even if it's impossible? Yes. Can God make a rock so heavy he can't lift it? Yes. Can he lift that rock? Yes. Then he just failed at making a rock so heavy he can't lift it

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CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's There? Person B came down with a serious case of amnesia that day and can't remember who anyone is.

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How do you kill a politician? You set him on fire and stab him in the back 20 times.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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A woman becomes pregnant. 9 months later she has a baby.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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How do u kill somebody You throw a fridge at him

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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