Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

thumb_up thumb_down -50

what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Rose are red, Violets are blue Your cat is dead Turkey

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why is travis so funny? Trick question, He died of cancer 3 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops