Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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What do you call a chicken with three eyes? One that flew over the cuckoo's nest.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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A seven foot tall kindergartener walks into a bar. He is reduced to tears after being ridiculed for his inordinate height and unappealing physical appearance. A bartender then proceeds to escort him out of the bar for being underaged. -BG_Shank_A

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A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

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Theres an app for the iPhone.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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a homeless man walks into a bar, the bartender and patrons treat him nicely, and sympathize for his current situation.

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charlie sheen

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What did the gay lifeguard tell the little boy at the pool? No running!

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

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Your mom is so old, I am surprised she can still own a house and function on her own.

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I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

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Q:What did the turtle say to the jaguar? A: Well, a turtle and a jaguar live in totally different habitats, turtles live in water while jaguars live in grasslands, so it would be unlikely for them to cross paths and communicate. Turtles and jaguars are unable to speak and, if a jaguar were to talk to a turtle, the turtle would be unable to make out words because turtles can only pick up vibrations. And, they would have nothing to talk about.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

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what do you call your mom? mom

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When Chuck Norris dives into a pool... he gets wet due to the aqueous nature of the water

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops