Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

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8=> >->-o

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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A man walks into a bar... "OUCH", he says for no apparent reason. He then buys a beer.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

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Antijokes...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because animals walking across a paved street is a very common occurrence ever since the industrialization of the modern world.

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A man told this joke once... it wasn't funny.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

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Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

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What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

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whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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field day?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops