Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a murderer.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

Yo mama so fat that when she jumped into a pool she displaced more water than someone who was of a normal weight

A dyslectic man walks into a bra. It was dark and he didn't see the laundry his wife hanged on the clothes line.

An Irishman walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After a while, the bartender comes over to him and asks if he would like another beer. He says no and leaves.

What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for Christmas? The sweet, merciful release of death at the hands of his father, who had been struggling with the emotional and financial drain of raising a severely disabled child for many years. It was only a matter of time before the man snapped, as he was a single parent working twenty hour days, seven days a week, to just barely cover all the medical bills that the specialists and therapy incurred.

why did the black guy say he was ridin' dirty? because its been weeks since he last took it to the coin op, he's busy working as an I.T Specialist.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

Why is this anti-joke here? Because someone submitted it to this website.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

Micheal jackson had half a pie, Fred had the other half of the pie, They both shared a pie.

what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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