Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

how do you get a clown off a swing? hit him with an axe

whats worse than getting killed by a random tomahawk in COD mostly anything because COD is only a video game

A man walks into a vagina

Sloths

What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

What's green and red? A frog in a blender

Dave: Knock, knock Steven: Come in.

what does idk mean? i dont know!! nobody knows!!

Why did Sarah fall of the swing, she had no arms. Knock Knock Who’s there? Not Sarah.

Lil Wayne

Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

Jerry Sandusky walks into an Under 21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...