little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, FUCK, MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE!

How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

Is maynaise an instrument?

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

A: "How much rope does it take to hang a baby?" B: "I don't know, how much?" A: "The guy at Home Depot didn't know either."

How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!

Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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