why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

Knock Knock F*ck of I'm watching p0rn

What did the black man say when he met a white man in the street? "Hello, how are you?"

What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

why was Ralph depressed? Because his family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn’t quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family’s murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family’s killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer’s whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers’ home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers’ body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn’s life didn’t, and wouldn’t, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him “You’re finally home Ralph, you’re finally home.”

Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

Have you heard the joke about the cat? No Are you kitten me

Cancer.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Ouch.

whats the meaning of stonehenge? ask the ones that built it!

Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

Whats the difference between a pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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