Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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dallen loves penis

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What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

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What do you call an awesome school? St Heinrich's Law School (Teaching you to break the laws!)

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Don't worry about giving me your phone number, I'll just follow you home later.

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Today, my doctor discovered I had a tumor in my brain the size of a walnut. FML.

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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oh hi, i'm an idiot, i mean mitt romney

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Yo mamas so dumb she has to repeat the 10th grade...again.

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Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

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What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

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Why was the boy adopted........ because hes grandad

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a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

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what do you call a sick eagle illegal

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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what did the older brother do? put on a joke on anti jokes what did the younger brother do ? give it a minus score what did the older brother do ? tell him and then played gears of war 2 (they got gears 3 but wanted to go bakc in time, not like michael J fox in a car with a crazy doctor but as in play an old game)

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Yo mama so poor, she can't afford luxuries

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Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim on land... it's called having a swimming pool

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Students, please find the surface integral.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a human profession, and the other is a type of fish.

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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