Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was shot.

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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What did the pirate order for breakfast? Pancakes.

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Why did the ship get lost at sea? The captain was a piece of bread.

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What happened to the mentaly retarted gentleman walking down the street? Nothing bad. He might a very fine woman and the went to dinner shortly after.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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The Qur'an

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

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Why did you chicken cross the road? C u n t.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office. Quack.

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People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get away from a gigantic tiger slowly stalking him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops