What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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How to you kill a pizza guy? Shoot him in the face.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

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My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why is there a rock in a boy's foot? He wasn't weraing shoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops