A man walks into a bar and says give me a 84 bourbon, when he gets it he spits it out and says this is no 84 bourbon this is a 74 scotch, So he asks for a 68 brandy , when he gets it he spits it out again in disgust saying this isn't a 68 brandy this is a 87 whiskey!, than the old man next to him says here try this, the man says what is it?, the old man just says try it, so the man does, he spits it out and shouts this is urine!, the old man says correct, now tell me how old i am.

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I once saw my grandparents making love.. that's why I dont eat raisens

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A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

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What is the difference between a car accident and being on your period? A period is less bloody.

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why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

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A white person went to see Think like a Lady by Steve Harvey.

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what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

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What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Released some juice and burst its skin.

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

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Why did little Timmy scrape his knee? He was launched off of an aircraft carrier.

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A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

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A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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What do you call a mother cow? Moooom

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What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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miha kako si?

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

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Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

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Your mom is so old that she most likely will die soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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