Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Knock-knock Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana you glad I didn't say banana?

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

Do knock-knock jokes apply to homeless people?

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

Penis

So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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