A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

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Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men jump out, and the plane crashes anyway.

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How do you keep kids off your lawn? You molest them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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How do u make a black man cry? Kill his family!

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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Roses are red, yup.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police The police who? Sir, your wife is dead.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? Because ever since 3 died, 7 had changed. He had turned aggressive and randomly snapped and hit out at some of the other numbers for no apparent reason.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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How come grilled cheese?

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What did the fish want to drink? Charlie Brown

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When life throws you lemons, Throw grenades.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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