What did the man do when he found a lost dog in his yard? He shot it. This was a very old, lonely, and distressed man with many unresolved problems resulting from his childhood in poverty.

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Bob: Oh, there was a big surfing competition in Hawaii. Bill: that's really cool. Bob: yeah, there were huge waves up to 53 feet. Bill: Awesome! Bob: Yeah there was a Japanese guy that won. Bill: Wow, that will bring up the spirits of japan. Bob: Yeah, but he got disqualified. Bill: No, how?!?! Bob: he was surfing on his dresser.

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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WHAT DO U CALL GINGERS GABRIELLA

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

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Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

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the power to turn magnetism into light

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What did the man say to the woman giving him a blowjob? That feels good.

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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what did timmy from southpark say after his warther melested him? TIMMY

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What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

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Q: what is an anti-joke? A: Coffee Volvos

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A vet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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