Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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John Travolta went to a seafood disco last week.

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Why did Jessica fall off the swing? She doesn't have any arms Knock, knock Whose there? Not Jessica

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Doctor, Doctor, I can't feel my legs? We're going to have to amputate it to prevent infection, you won't be able to walk again.

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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Aodhans da is Mr.Bradly and he dosnt know what coordinates are, 180 anti-clockwise,he has "the key to examination success is revision and homestudy tattooed on his chest, his das herbert the pervert, his mas a taxcollector and on the dole, his da sits on the roof eating biscuits, cleaning the satilite dish, he gets his pubes shaved in gordans chemist, he uses mcdonaldsd wifi, hes a fruit fly and he can stop global warming by shaking his head!!!!!!!!

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How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

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So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

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whats worse than the holocost, nothing

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Jokes=Funny Anti=Opposite Anti+Joke=Anti Joke Anti Joke= Anti Humour Anti Humour + People= Offensive Jokes Offensive Jokes= Often jokes about women Offensive Jokes=Problems Women=Problems

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Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

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What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

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What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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why couldnt justin beiber get into the club? because hes not legal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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