A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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Q: Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? A: Because she was a woman.

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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A man starts acting weird in a resturant, the waiter says "whats the problem sir?" The man says "I'm choking and I just died."

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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haha

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why did matt die? He had cancer

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why wont me daughter eat my feces

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

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What's black and hangs from trees? Tire swings

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What do you call cheese that isnt yours? Stolen cheese.

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Roses are red Violets are actually purple You should probably see an eye doctor.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

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Q: What is black, white and red all over? A: Interracial sex during the time which the bible has decreed as abhoration.

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knock knock. Whos there? YELLOW PEOPLE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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