Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

why was Logan sad? he was raped by his daddy multiple times

Why do cows have bad hand writing? because they don't have thumbs

What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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