Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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What happens when you put a baby, a dog and a cat in the same bag They will all most likely suffocate if left in the bag too long

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roses are red and violets are blue and i was going to write something that rimes but that is not funny here.

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What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

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What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" "pizza delivery!"

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Why didn't Suzie Fall off the Swings? She Has no legs and couldn't get on

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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