- Anti Joke

what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

Why was little Johnny crying? He is regularly raped by his father.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

A man walks to a bar and sees a very hot blonde sitting across the room. Turns out it was actually a blonde man and they both had a wonderful night because they were both homosexual.

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

What do you call a puppy with all it's legs missing? Franklin, the quadraplegic puppy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Roses are gray, violets are gray. I'm color blind.

How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

Why did Susie fall off the swings? Because she was hit by a truck.

What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

I had friends on the Death Star.

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

What is the hottest day of the week? Wednesday

What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp