what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

Knock Knock Who's there? The IRS. You've been convicted of tax evasion.

what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

Your mom is so fat that she sat on a rock.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Q: Why did the crazy man stare at the orange juice container? A: Because it started talking.

What do you say to the child with bruises on his arms? Stop hitting yourself.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

gingers

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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