A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

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A man rode into town on friday and left on friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a week

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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There's a mexican and african american in a car. Who's driving? A cop.

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How do you stop a cat from urinating on your floor? Shoot it.

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Why doesn't the boy get anything for Christmas? His parents died the night before!

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Penis.

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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Why did the boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? A pilot.

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Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.-South Park

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whats red, sits in a corner and is slowly getting smaller and smaller baby with a cheese grater whats green and sits motionless in the corner same baby 2 weeks later

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What did the pepper say to Mr. Peno? Hallo peno!

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Why couldn't the Jeffersons adopt a black baby? Their fireplace was empty.

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Roses are red, Because they can intrinsically change color through natural dyes.

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I took my father out last night. We went to the Olive Garden.

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whats white jizz

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Father "Why so down son?" Son "I've always been this short..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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